SO, YOUR PARTNER DOESN’T SUPPORT YOU?
This is a challenging topic to address – I’ll give my opinion, which of course is not fact.
𝐀 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐈 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐬𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐬,
‘𝗪𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐝𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐝𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 – 𝐈 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧?’
There’s a few pieces to this, so let’s break it down…
𝗪𝐇𝐘 𝐈𝐒 𝐈𝐓 𝐀 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐑𝐍?
Of course, it’s going to cause problems in your relationship if you don’t get to the bottom of it.
But, if you’re made to feel bad for making YOUR health a priority,
And you’re not strong enough to stand up to your partner,
This may end in you self-sabotaging your results,
Leading to feelings of worthlessness and having you go back to square one.
𝗪𝐇𝐘 𝗪𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐘 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐒𝐔𝐏𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔?
It helps to ask the question, so you can try and understand it from their angle.
The truth is, that by you moving forward and self-improving, they may feel left behind, and that scares them.
If they don’t feel strong enough to start their own journey, then unconsciously sabotaging yours is a way to keep you with them.
Perhaps they haven’t yet had a smack in the face, that has forced them to value their health,
So, you spending money on something that doesn’t give THEM joy, pisses them off.
Most likely, they don’t understand your reasons for starting in the first place,
You’ve been silent about how you’ve felt shitty for years and have kept delaying addressing it.
𝐒𝐎, 𝗪𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐃𝐎?
It’s critical that you share honestly and vulnerably your reasons for wanting change.
If you love them, tell them, so they understand this is about you, not them.
Explain to them that their support is important for you to become the best version of yourself that you can,
And that this in turn, benefits them.
If you’ve been feeling garbage, tell them exactly that and that you no longer want to feel like this.
Make them aware that you are not judging them, you are looking after and loving YOU.
Clear communication is absolutely everything.
𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘
𝐍𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐛𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐢𝐚𝐥.
Relationships get tested when couples do their own thing – sometimes it creates jealousy or angst
The reality is, you are an independent person that can only love, if you feel happy in, and about yourself.
The journey toward better health is so much easier when you do it together,
But trying to change your partner, or force them to start is never going to end well.
You can gently encourage, but they need to decide for themselves.
But, frankly, if they continue to make you feel bad or sabotage your results,
Even after clear communication has taken place,
You may be with the wrong person.
That’s a very, very hard idea to reconcile.
Every part of us will want to turn away from that idea.
But if you look at other areas of your life like finances, career, etc
And you are being inhibited in those too, I’d take this as a big red flag.
This is more a control issue, than something specific to your fitness journey.
And that is a largely problem to address…
𝗪𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬?